Fall Into Me
by BellsConlon
Summary: I wanna be the one you reach for first." He couldn't believe those words came out of his mouth. Who knew he could become this attached? That she had that past? That she could bring them closer? M/L, OC. Post S6 premiere. R
1. Chapter One

**Chapter One**

**beta'd by foiblesfables. Owe her a lot!**

**Just bear with me. This is going somewhere.**

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Lexie Grey knew what she liked.

Craniotomies were quickly becoming her favorite surgery, as she had scrubbed in on enough with Dr. Shepherd that he was beginning to allow her to actually do more than look pretty with the sucker. General surgery was a pretty enjoyable field as well, with Dr. Bailey proving to have taken a liking to the youngest Grey.

She enjoyed a good margarita and the occasional country song- Keith Urban was her guilty pleasure, particularly when Mark was drunk enough to sing along. Chinese food beat all other takeout- pizza was overrated- and juice boxes, despite her boyfriend's pleading, remained a staple of her lunchtime routine.

And of course there were those things she hated- cardio and ortho, boring surgeries she dreaded being assigned to, and apples- too tart, too crunchy and just plain gross. The nurses on the surgical floor- and every floor for that matter- were also another plague of her existence, purely because of the fact they flirted with her boyfriend even while being away he was with her. (Mark ignored it, of course, and was always sure to remind Lexie of just _how _much he was into her).

And then there was sex- not a like or a dislike; an addiction, something the craved constantly, like a drug addict to his poison of choice, the need always running through her veins, plaguing her thoughts.

It was the need that caused her to return home to the apartment some nights and, without a word, kiss Mark senseless and demand in a low voice to be taken then and there. It was the need that, despite her principals for trying to keep her relationship somewhat private, probably had the hospital hearing her scream out as her boyfriend yet again blew her mind with the best sex she knew she would ever get in her life.

It was the need that she now found herself trying to ignore as she chewed the top of her pen, watching her hunky piece of man candy lean casually against the wall next next to the surgical board as he conversed with his best friend.

Lexie, having been on-call for close to thirty-six hours now- thirty-six hours with no sex and very little sight of her boyfriend- bit down harder on the cap of her pen, her mind spinning places she knew it shouldn't as her gaze never left her boyfriend's frame.

"Does Mark know you're undressing him mentally right now?" Lexie was snapped out of her daydream by the sound of her sister's voice as Meredith came next to her, placing her chart down on the counter of the nurse's station, reaching into her pocket for a pen.

"I wasn't doing anything of the sort," Lexie tried to defend lamely, knowing very well Meredith wasn't buying the lie as her sister rolled her eyes.

"My advice if you're that horny? Go get some," was all her sister had to say, raising an eyebrow and smirking before walking away. Lexie watched her go and bit her lip, mulling the unconventional advice over in her mind. It would be so _easy- _he wasn't scheduled for surgery for another few hours and Cristina, still in the pissy mood that she had seemed to have patented over the last month, had assigned Lexie to scut for the second consecutive shift in a row. It would be so easy to just drag him into an on-call room, lock the door, and jump him. Hospital sex was something she had tried to avoid since moving in with Mark-being as they were together every night and she could always dash across the street during a lunch break- but her hormones and the growing feeling of need between her legs were clouding her judgement.

With a definite click of the file, Lexie left her work on the counter of the nurse's station and in a few strides crossed the area to where Derek and Mark were standing, her brother-in-law's back to her, but he quickly turned as Mark's gaze left his and focused instead on his girlfriend.

"Lexie," Derek greeted, observing the intense and somewhat smoldering gaze she was giving her boyfriend, never once turning to acknowledge Derek as she replied, "Dr. Shepherd."

Mark, an amused smile growing on his face, appraised his girlfriend's gaze and asked, "Everything okay, Dr. Grey?"

"Can I just borrow you for a quick moment, Dr. Sloan?" she asked, raising an eyebrow in hopeful suggestion of what she truly meant. "There's, um, a patient's needs that need to be addressed."

"A patient's needs?" Mark's smirk grew into a full on smile as he picked up on the no-so-subtle booty call. "Can't have them ignored, now can we."

Derek, observing the scene, rolled his eyes and checked his page hopefully before saying, "And this is clearly my cue to leave. Try to keep it down."

Mark turned away from his girlfriend and said in a bit of a harsh tone, "You do not get to judge. Lex told me about the kitchen."

Lexie avoided Derek's critical gaze before smoothly replying, "My house, I can do what I want. At least my significant other isn't ignored so long as to get so horny she needs on-call room sex. We're past that."

"Yeah, you moved into your office," Mark retorted, Lexie stifling a laugh that came out as a snort. Derek looked down at her again before reiterating, "Just try to keep it down," and walking away.

-------

Minutes later, Lexie found herself pressed up against the room's door, Mark's lip trailing down her neck as his warm hands reached under her scrub top, sending chills of delight through her body at the contact. She moaned as he began to suck, her eyes fluttering closed in delight.

She allowed herself to be picked up and gently tossed onto the bed as Mark leaned over her, his forearms on either side of her head to support his weight as his lips fused with hers once more. Her arms found their way around his neck, pulling him closet as she mumbled against his lips, "I missed you."

Mark murmured in agreement, breaking contact of their lips but pressing his forehead to hers, saying in a low voice, "Yang and her slave-driver hours are really pissing me off. You should talk to her about that," before his hands worked their way up her shirt, pushing it up as he began to press kisses to her stomach.

"Yeah, because Cristina and the Chief will be thrilled to work out my schedule around our sex life," she managed to say, her thoughts growing fuzzy as she allowed Mark to slid her shirt up and over her head, his lips returning to her neck and the valley between her breasts, her fingers coming through his hair as she let out a moan.

"Bra. Off. Now," she gasped, her boyfriend only to happy to oblige. The clasp came undone, her bare breasts exposed to the air as Mark stared down at her for a moment, Lexie growing self-conscious as she meekly asked, "What?"

"You are so fucking hot," he growled before latching onto her right breast, his hand fondling the other as Lexie's back arched into him, aware of the lack of skin-on-skin contact she so craved.

She pushed him away, Mark's face becoming a mask of confusion and then awe as she flipped him over, straddling his lap as he allowed her to push his scrub to over his head, aware of the blood rushing to the area between his legs. It amazed him how sweet, innocent Lexie could turn into such a dominating force.

"Thirty-six hours," she breathed before their lips met again, the kiss hard and passionate. Hand began to roam, clothing slowly shed before...

_BEEP._

Lexie moaned, but not because of what Mark was currently doing between her legs. He rolled off of her as she shifted to reach for her pager, sighing loudly as she swung her knees to stand up.

"Oh no you don't," Mark growled, catching her wrist to pull her back down. Lexie laughed as he pulled her to his chest, effectively trapping her in his embrace.

"Mark, it was Cristina," Lexie explained, placing her hands on his chest in a failed attempt to break out of his arms.

"I thought you were on scut," he reminded, placing a kiss at the base of her neck.

"Yes, well, the pit is apparently overflowing so I was paged," Lexie said. "And if you want me to come home at a decent hour tonight, pissing Cristina off wouldn't be the smartest idea."

Against his better wishes, Mark understood that logic and reluctantly released his girlfriend, putting his hands under his head as he watched his girlfriend get dressed.

"I'll see you later," Lexie said, pressing a kiss to lips before dashing out of the door.

-----

The pit was swarming when Lexie arrived-the result of a highway collision as she was so informed by a passing nurse. She didn't her resident in any of the filled trauma bays, though, and made her way out to the ambulance bay, slipping on a yellow gown on the way.

As she thought, Cristina was standing with Owen, Steve a few feet away, looking expectantly down the road for the incoming vehicle.

"Enjoy the mcnasty with McSteamy?" Cristina asked, looking out of the corner of her eye to her intern with an amused smirk on her face.

"I didn't-that's totally- w-why would you say that?" Lexie stuttered, her face going red as Cristina replied, "Your scrub pants are on backwards."

Before Lexie could look down, the siren whine of the incoming ambulance could be heard and Owen took a step forward and, as the doors swung open, calmly voiced the words Lexie had begun to just associate him with.

"What've we got?"

"Mikayla Clarkson, sixteen year old female who was found collapsed over the toilet by her roommate, vomiting blood. Left leg break, unsure of exact point of origin, knee injuries, weak back, low BP with runs of V-tach in the field and low body weight," the paramedic said, assisting Cristina as they lifted the stretcher out of the back of the ambulance, Cristina's gaze falling onto the patient's face, a young girl who facial bones were nearly poking out of her face.

"Looks like an eating disorder," she muttered to Owen as the paramedic continued with, "Fell and hit her head on the bar when the leg broke, deep cut, possible skull fracture."

"Okay, we need to get her stable and in decent enough shape to get her up to MRI, X-ray, and EKG," Owen assessed as they wheeled her into a trauma room, Cristina reached for a suture and IV kit, motioning for one of her interns to insert the line.

"Grey, page Shepherd and Sloan. Tell them to get here now, we can't take her anywhere until she stabilizes. Start her on fluids and ten of dopamine," Owen ordered, the room a flurry of activity as interns and nurses did as they were told, hooking the patient up to a monitor, oxygen mast, and EKG.. "She's got low BP, looking as if it's caused from anorexia nervosa, which means her heart could go at any moment, so whoever is doing that EKG, do it and do it now!"

Cristina pushed Steve aside and watched the readout, confirming her suspicion.

"Readout's not good," she said, as Owen came to look over her shoulder while Steve called out, "Uh, Dr. Yang?"

"Call up to cardio and ortho while you're at it, Grey," Yang barked at Lexie, who hadn't yet left the room, before coming to Steve's side, where he had pushed up her sleeve to insert another IV for a fluid drip.

"Another ten of dopamine!" Owen nearly roared as the heart monitor began beeping wildly. "Call up to MRI and tell them to clear out. The minute Shepherd gets in and assesses the head and back trauma we're moving!"

"I'm here!" Derek called loudly, taking a minute to examine the patient's bleeding injury before reading for a needle and announcing, "No visible trauma. Possible concussion. Where did she hit it?"

"Bathroom," Cristina replied, laying a strip of gauze across the girl's bleeding arm. "Collapsed while purging."

"So the head trauma's not the only worry," Derek gathered, looking up as Mark entered. "And back injury I was told?"

"We'll get a better picture in MRI," Owen replied. "I'm not risking flipping her if there's internal damage."

"Order closer images on the throat," Mark ordered. "If she was vomiting blood, she did some damage to the vocal chords and esophagus."

Just as he said these words, Lexie burst back into the room.

"MRI's cleared if you're ready!" she said breathlessly, Owen nodding to her in thanks before wheeling the girl out of the room, Cristina and Derek following. Lexie looked down at the young girl's face, feeling a protective pull as she was wheeled away.

"You okay?" Mark asked, placing a hand on her shoulder as to turn her to face him. Lexie nodded.

"She's so young..." Her voice trailed off, her mind flashing back to ten years before, when her best friend in high school...no, she wouldn't go there. "To go through that..."

"Through what?" Mark was confused now. "She collapsed and was rushed to the ER.. It happens."

"She has an eating disorder, Mark," Lexie reminded flatly as the they began to walk up to radiology, Lexie to find her resident and Mark to take a look at the images he had ordered. "It's just...I don't know. I see a lot of sad things come through those doors and I've never liked the psych cases like that."

"Can't wait to meet the family," Mark mused, causing Lexie to stop in the hall and stare at him.

"What is that suppose to mean?"

"They say cases like that are always brought on by the home environment, right?" Mark asked. "Just should be interesting."

"It just should be _sad."_

This time Mark came to a stop, taking Lexie's arm and pulling her to the side of the hallway.

"Lex, this isn't Emily," he said, knowing very well whom his girlfriend was thinking about. "This isn't Emily, it isn't you finding her."

"That's...Mark, I'm fine. Just-it's just sad. And I'm fine. Sad and fine."

Mark looked critically down at his girlfriend for a moment, her doe eyes widening as she nodded.

"Really fine?"

"Really fine."

----

An hour late, Lexie found herself scanning the waiting room, Mikayla Clarkson's already large file clutched in her arms. Cristina, after she and Mark had arrived in the booth, had given Lexie the assignment of admitting and forming Mikayla's chart, complete with patient history. (Cristina knew how much Lexie dreaded this job. She found it unfair that just because Cristina had no sex life and she did meant that Cristina got to beat on her so).

And so Lexie found herself now scanning the waiting room, focusing in on a group of tall, thin, leggy girls dressed in black sweat clothes, their pulled up into severe buns.

_Dancer friends, _Lexie thought_,_ walking in their of the girls- tall, with dark features and a worried expression, looked up from her phone and eyed Lexie, noting her scrubs and lab coat before standing and gracefully walking toward her.

"Are you a doctor?" she asked, and then noticed the inscription that read _Alexandra Grey, M.D._ before continuing in a rush, "Well, yes. Um, do you know anything about Kay? Mikayla Clarkson? She um, I found her and then called the dorm advisor and then she kicked me out when the ambulance came but they excused me from class, so Kiki- she can drive- we all came over and-"

Lexie put hand on the girl's shoulder- she quieted and Lexie lead her back to her chair, where two other girls were waiting.

"I'm Dr. Grey," Lexie introduced. "And I take it your Mikayla's friends?"

The three girls nodded and her roommate said in the same anxious tone, "Yes, I'm Ainsley, her roommate, and this is Kiki and Tasha. How is she?"

"Okay, okay, calm down," Lexie said, her heart aching a little to see the concerned expressions on the girl's faces. "Now, I need to talk to Mikayla's parents to gather her family history and any other medical information that is necessary so-"

_"_Her parents aren't here," Ainsley said, looking to Kiki and Tasha before turning back to Lexie. "We all- we're signed by Pacific Northwest Ballet and she's- she gained legal emancipation a year ago and then her parents died a few months later and-"

Lexie held up a hand, her mind going numb as she voiced her thoughts.

"So she, Mikayla, has _no one?" _Her voice rose as the girls nodded, Ainsley looking down at her lap before meeting Lexie's eye, nodded. "She's got no one."


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

**beta'd by foiblesfables. She's a godsend.**

**A/N: I am overwhelmed by the number of reviews and alerts I have recieved- it means so much and motivates me to keep writing this story. I am so grateful to the six who reviewed- it made me smile as I read them. The faith you guys have in this story is so fabulous! Let me know how you like the characterization and storyline- constructive criticism is always welcome. Thank you all again!!!**

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Chapter Two

The conference room was abuzz with noise. Mikayla Clarkson's file was in the middle of the table as the attendings, the Chief and hospital lawyer stood around in the midst of a tense meeting.

Mark stood to the side, arms crossed, his brow furrowed as he listened, voicing his opinion where necessary but otherwise trying to tune it all out, instead focusing on his girlfriend's face. The past twenty-four hours had turned his girlfriend into the silent observer, a shell. She had returned home and gone straight to bed, without sex or food or a word to Mark.. He knew she had to be thinking about Emily, and a part of him felt horrible for questioning why she was _this _upset.

"I need to get in and fix the disc shift before there is anymore damage to her spine," Derek pressed, slamming his down on the table. "And I can't wait!"

"The surgery is extremely risky, not to mention the fact that we don't know what her insurance plan is nor do we have her consent," the lawyer yelled harshly in response. "We legally can't so anything-"

"-and we'll face more legal _crap _if we let her die!" Derek spat back.

"If I don't got in and set the legs soon, she may not have full function," Callie Torres added, her voice unusually level and calm, although loud in volume, commanding and threatening. Mark almost swelled with pride at how far Callie had come since George's death. "And since she is covered by the ballet company's health insurance, they may be none too pleased if their dancer doesn't have function of her legs again."

"She won't be dancing anytime soon, leg surgery or not," Mark spoke up, straightening up from his position leaning against the wall to place a hand on the long table. "The MRI showed significant damage to the vocal chords, larynx and esophagus. That recovery time could be a while."

This statement again was countered by the lawyer, the Chief then speaking up, and so and so forth, the constant battle that had been occurring for the past hour. Mark sighed and crossed the room to Lexie's side, subtly placing a hand on hers.

"You okay?" he murmured. Lexie, keeping her eyes ahead on the argument at bay, nodded.

"Fine," she replied curtly. "This is just stupid."

"It'll work out," Mark assured her.. "They'll stop shouting and-"

"-remember that even though she's a teen, she's technically a legal adult and all it takes is two M.D. signatures to go ahead with all of this," Lexie finished. "I know."

"So why are you walking around like the sky is falling?" Mark asked. "Because before she came in, we were in the on-call room and everything was fine and now...."

Lexie turned to look up at him, her eyes blazing.

"There is a sixteen year old girl who's knocked out on pain meds because when she wakes up, we have to inform not only of her medical crap and the fact she can't dance again- the thing she loves the most- and then we get to ship her to the psych ward. And they're yelling about legal crap instead of saving a life. And I know that it has to be done, I get that but its all-"

"Lex-"

"-a load of freaking-"

"Something you have to say, Dr. Grey?" The Chief asked, all eyes turned to her, her voice having been rising in volume during her ranting monologue.

Lexie lookedfrom Mark to her other superiors before taking a breath and saying, "She's technically a legal adult. The emancipation was given because she has a job, the dancing, and she has the status and rights of an adult. And if you all would just shut up and stop pretending what you have to say is more important than the next person-"

"Dr. Grey!" The Chief's tone had turned harsh, a yell.

"The damn lawyer was trying to tell you that," Lexie said flatly. "Call PNB and find the damn insurance plan and do the surgeries and let this girl live!"

And with that she stormed out, leaving all eyes looking questioningly toward Mark.

"What?" he asked, feeling uncomfortable under the scrutiny. Derek gave him a look that seemed to say 'She's your girlfriend, your problem,' and Mark, with a sigh, went to go after her.

---

Mark did _not _got after Lexie, though- not because he didn't want to but, but because he knew Lexie and knew that giving her space was the best thing to to at the time. She would talk when she was ready.

He didn't pass her in the hall or see her inside the gallery while he was in surgery- his best guess was that Yang heard the scuttle-buff of what had happened in the meeting- having not been there herself due to the fact that she was in CT with the patient- and had put

Lexie on scut as punishment.

Hours later though, he missed the sight of her and was glad to see, when he pushed open the apartment door, Lexie at the counter, munching on a bowl of cereal, once of his Columbia sweatshirts drowning her frame.

**"**Hey," he greeted, locking the door behind him as he dropped his bag and coat on the counter. "You just get in?"

She nodded and swallowed before replying, "About half an hour ago. How did your rhinoplasty go?"

He loved that she knew his schedule..

"Fine, pretty much textbook," he replied, sitting on the couch. She stood, dropped her bowl into the sink, and sand down onto his lap**,** pressing a kiss to his lips.

"Mm," he murmured against her lips as she snuggled into his chest. "You're happy. Which normally isn't weird except you weren't happy earlier."

"I'm fine," she assured, her hands lacing around the back of his neck. "Just a momentary freak-out. It's all good."

"Lex...."

She shifted so that her forehead touched his, their gazes inches apart.

"You really want to know?" he nodded and she pulled away, standing up to pace, pulling the sleeves of the sweatshirt over her hands, a nervous habit she had developed during the first finals in med school.

"When we slept together the first time, the me-stripping first time, what did you feel? Aside from the immediate infatuation with me and all," she added with a smile.

"What do you mean?" he asked, unsure of how to respond.

"Didn't you feel anything? Guilt? Disloyalty to Derek? I don't know, something?"

Mark opened his mouth to deny, but the look on her face- pleading, a bit lost- made his stop to think, to try to see where she was coming from, thinking back to that night, after the sex and the talking, when Lexie had fallen asleep. He remembered the settling feeling of dread, the heavy weight of...

"Guilt," he said. "I felt guilty for repeating a mistake, betraying Derek again. I did the one thing he asked me not to do, _again. _ Doing something I know would hurt him. But I wasn't focused on that- I was just focused on pleasing myself, giving into what I wanted?"

"You wanted to sleep with me _that _badly?" Despite her upset demeanor, she had to smirk.

"Lex, c'mon." Her smile faded but he pulled her back onto his lip, placing a small kiss on her neck before whispering, "And yeah, I did."

She playfully hit his chest before leaning her back into him, going on.

"That feeling though, that-that's what this is like for me," she began to explain. "There's all this guilt- guilt over Emily, over Clara, and then this huge weight of panic over seeing her so alone and remembering how I felt when I first came."

She felt Mark's arms tighten around her- she knew he hated the stories of her first few months in Seattle, between her rocky beginning of hitting on Derek and then her attraction to George. Despite him having died, it was still a bit of a sore subject with her boyfriend.

"You're not alone now," he reminded. "And you're not fourteen again, Lex. Mikayla's not Emily."

"I know, I know, I know!" Lexie's voice rose a level with each phrase. She pushed out Mark's arms and stood up again, running a hand through her hair. "And usually I never think back to her , I honestly haven't thought about her in years, not since med school. And know..."

"I get it," Mark empathized, reaching for her hand again. She pulled away at first, but gave in and collapsed back next to him. "It's your April sixth."

Lexie nodded, understanding what it took for him to openly bring that up in front of her. He had grown; Mark had grown.

"Yeah," she agreed. "It's my April sixth. And you know what?"

"Yeah?"

"It sucks."

---

Meredith looked past Cristina, drumming her fingers on the linoleum countertop as her gaze took in her sister's form, leaning close to her boyfriend, a small smile spread across her face.

Cristina met her friend's eye, a puzzled look on her face, and turned to look over her shoulder to follow Meredith's gaze.

"Why are we eye-stalking McMini you and her McHottie boyfriend?" Cristina asked, her eyes questioningly wide as she took a bite of her sandwich.

"McMini me?"

Cristina shrugged.

"You sleep with a Mc, you need a Mc-nickname," she explained. "But my slightly odd logic is beside the point. Why the sudden interest in your sister?"

"Derek said she completely freaked out yesterday in the differential meeting over the emaciated emancipated teen and I'm just wondering why she's all bright and shiny again," Meredith said. "Usually you don't from dark and twisty to bright and shiny that quickly."

"And by 'you' I'm assuming you're referring directly to yourself," Izzie said, setting her tray next to Meredith as Alex placed his across the table next to Cristina. "Some of us don't necessarily always join forces with tequila every time something goes wrong."

"Tequila and I have not been united for a while," Meredith defended. "And I'm beside the point here. Lexie was sad; she freaked out to a superior. She doesn't do that. Bright, shiny, smiley face people don't do that."

"Yeah, apparently she did really flip _out _at Shepherd and Webber," Alex informed. "I heard him going on about it to Bailey in surgery yesterday."

"Well they were being kind of stupid," Cristina put in, pointing a fork in Meredith's direction as she began to talk about Derek. "Shepherd and the Chief were arguing over a lot of legal crap they should've just been aware of."

"Your boyfriend was in there too," Meredith reminded with a snap. "I didn't hear about him jumping in to move things along so they could get back to the patient."

"It could be one of those things were Lexie is just really into the case," Izzie suggested.. "It is a cool one."

"Really into it or really attached to the patient?" Alex asked, looking at his wife. "Because you know from personal experience that's not a good thing."

Izzie nodded good-naturally; Alex didn't mean it as a jab. "Good point."

"So if she was freaking because she's attached, why is she still on the case?" Meredith asked, turning to her best friend. "You're on the case- why isn't she off?"

"Sloan's not going to take her off," Cristina scoffed. "You know the benefits of sleeping with your boss."

"I never abused it!"

"Oh please," Izzie said. "You so did. Even if it wasn't blatantly obvious, Derek did you favors. Look at the clinical trial. He said yes without blinking."

"Not true."

"He would've shot any of us down," Alex countered. "And you know it." Meredith couldn't argue with that.

"Okay, so she's getting a favor," she agreed. "But Mark should know that's its not right."

"We don't even know if her caring was reason she freaked out," Alex reminded. "She might've just wanted to get a move on with the surgery."

The three girls shook their heads.

"It's an attachment thing," Cristina stated. She turned to Meredith.. "But what I don't get is why you care so much."

Meredith looked at her sister and Mark again before replying, "I just still don't like them together. She's throwing a really promising future away."

"No she's not," Izzie, the ever positive romantic, countered. "She's found someone who makes her happy. So did all of us. Why is it so wrong for Lexie to have as well?"

"Because it's Sloan," Meredith said flatly. "Nothing good ever occurs with him involved."

Izzie looked over her shoulder, watching as Mark stood and helped Lexie up with a hand, piling her tray on top of his as the two left the cafeteria.

"I don't know," Izzie said. "Sometimes people can surprise you.

"Sloan aside, it's still weird for you to give a shit about her," Alex said. "Well, give a shit more so than you usually do. 'Cause haven't you been working on that or something?"

Meredith shot in a nasty look and Izzie hit him across the shoulder.

"My _point,_" Meredith emphasized, "is that I know what attachment, especially if the patient is a extreme case like that one, can do to a person." She looked pointedly at Izzie before adding in a softer tone, "and I wouldn't wish that pain on anybody."

---

The world was groggy, a blur, with dashes of color and a mix of voices just beyond her reach. She knew something happened- she remembered the rush of critical emotions she felt after class, dashing back to her dorm, and dropping over the toilet before all went black.

Even now, as she stirred and things came into focus, she was unsure of where she was or what she was looking at.

There was an intense pain spreading through her body, aching feelings, and her throat felt locked, but her arms wouldn't respond to her request to move them and take out the obstruction.

Her eyes opened and her gaze focused in on a young woman who, upon seeing her eyes open, jumped up and put a hand on hers.

"Don't try to move," she advised in a soft tone. "I'm a doctor; this Seattle Grace Hospital. There-there was accident and you're probably in a lot of pain right now, I'm guessing, and I'm sorry.. You've been sedated because of the we had you intubated- you're not breathing on your own."

It took a moment to take this all in- she was in a hospital. There was an accident. Someone knows. Someone's going to make her 'get better.'

There was a beeping in the background as her heart monitor, sensing her distress, began to rise with her pulse.

"Okay, okay, it's okay," the doctor soothed. "That was a lot to take in, I'm sorry Mikayla. I'm going to page the nurse and sedate you again, okay? I'm sorry."

There was a flurry of activity and before she knew it, she was drifting peacefully back into the blur.

---

Lexie stood outside Mikayla's room, watching through the window as her patient's heart rate stabilized and she went back into the induced sleep. She crossed her arms tightly over her chest and bit her lip, turning her head slightly when she felt a light touch on her shoulder.

"Hey."

"Hi," she said in response to her boyfriend. "Quick surgery?"

"Called off temporarily," Mark replied as Lexie fully turned to face him.

"Why?" she asked quizzically.

He looked up and down the hall before wrapping his arms around her waist and saying in a low voice, "Because I heard you've been camped out at her beside every moment your not in surgery and I can't go into surgery worrying about you."

"You don't have to worry about me," Lexie said, looking down to avoid meeting his eye. Mark lifted her chin gently and replied, "Lex, I _want _to worry about you, okay? But this"-he gestured in the direction of Mikayla's room- "isn't healthy. So why do it to yourself?"

Lexie shook her head slowly, watching Mikayla through the open window for a moment before she said, "I don't know. I know it's stupid, I know I'm hurting myself, but Mark...."

She turned to look up at her boyfriend.

"Look at her! She's all alone- she has no one. You would know better than me what that feels like, growing up the way you did with your parents and all and it kills me when I think about you dealing with that all those years and I just...I can't just leave her alone, Mark. It might not make sense to you, but-"

Mark put a finger to her lips and she nodded.

"My turn," he replied with a smirk. "The rambling's cute though. Kind of a turn on."

"Mark."

"Sorry, right. Look, I hate seeing you hurt like this, but if it's what you feel like you need to do, I'm going to back you on it.. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't?"

"A really hot jerk?" Lexie offered with a small smile.

"Yeah, and now I can a really hot, sweet, caring boyfriend."

"Ego warning."

"You know it's true." He put a hand on the wall on either side of her head and bent down to press a kiss to her lips.

"Mmm," she murmured. "I do."

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	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

**beta'd by foiblesfables. She's a godsend.**

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Lexie groaned and she felt Mark shift away from her in bed, leaning over to silence his pager, which had awoken them both with its loud beeping.

"Ignore it," she grumbled, pulling the comforter over her bare shoulders to provide the warmth Mark's body previously had been. "It's too early."

"It's three, Lex," Mark told her, kissing her temple before standing up. "The alarm's going off in an hour anyway. Really doesn't make a difference."

"I'm on call tomorrow night; an hour of sleep does make a difference."

"Well I'm going in now," he said. "Apparently the anorexic patient's BP has been up and down all night; Callie's going into fix the break this morning and they want to me to at least repair some of the damage to the larynx while she's under."

Lexie sat up, the air cold on her bare skin as she had fallen asleep in her bra and an old pair of Mark's sweatpants. She picked up her boyfriend's discarded shirt and pulled it over her head, following him into the bathroom,

"Is she even stable enough to be operated on?" Lexie asked, pulling herself up onto the counter as Mark, toothbrush in his mouth, shrugged. "And isn't Derek supposed to go in on her back before we worry about her legs?"

Mark rinsed his mouth of toothpaste before replying, "She's not stable enough to handle spinal surgery. Fixing the leg is going to hopefully stabilize her BP."

"So why do you have to cut into her throat?" Lexie asked. "That's extending her time under anesthesia by at least three hours."

"I know," Mark said, turning on the shower, "but if I get in there and clean up some of the damage, she can get off intubation."

"At the risk of coding on the table," Lexie reminded flatly, crossing her arms over her chest. "Not the best idea."

"I was the one who suggested it."

Lexie's brow furrowed as she looked at her boyfriend critically. "Why would you do that? You know how fragile she is! What Callie's going into is high risk enough!"

Mark didn't say anything for a moment, instead stripping out of his boxers and entering the shower, letting the water rain down on him, then saying, "I suggested it because it's going to make her more comfortable when she wakes up. If she's off the tube she won't be sedated and the girl's got to be in enough pain without wanting to rip her throat out."

Lexie jumped off the counter and looked at Mark through the glass of the door, her face now a mask of disbelief and confusion.

"Wait, what?" She was unsure if she heard him correctly. "You suggested it, not to win points with the chief or some other self centered reason, but to make her more comfortable post-op?"

"Yep."

Lexie's arms fell to her sides. "Who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend?"

Mark looked quizzically down at her, unsure of why she mad about this.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"You, known for being slightly egotistical and self-serving, you-you suggested it? For good of the patient?"

"Yeah."

"No other reason. Nothing?"

Mark sighed and ran a hand over his face.

"Why are you having so much trouble believing this?" he asked. "Because I'm thinking you really pissed right now and I don't know what I did."

Lexie shook her head slowly before a smile crept across her face.

"Oh, I'm not mad," she assured him. "In shock, because you're acting slightly out of character."

"Out of character? Ouch. And here I thought I was doing a good thing."

"You are," Lexie promised with a laugh. "Are you sure you're not just taking credit for say, Izzie's idea or something?"

Mark tilted his head back under the stream, allowing the water to rinse the shampoo out of his hair as replied, "No, I didn't steal Stevens' idea. I did it because of you."

Lexie's next retort fell from her lips as her boyfriend rendered her speechless for a moment.

"I'm sorry, you what?"

"I did it for you," Mark repeated without meeting her gaze. "And now I feel like a jackass because you don't even believe me."

"I never said that," Lexie said softly, a warm feeling spreading through her as she realized the true meaning of what Mark had done.. "I just...it's..."

His gaze locked with eyes. "It's what?"

She responded by pulling his shirt over her head and unclasping her bra, stepping out of her pants and underwear before stepping into the shower with him, allowing the spray to soak her body as she laced her arms around his neck, saying simply, "Thank you," before kissing him deeply. "It means a lot."

"You were hurting," Mark explained. "I was sick of seeing you hurt. It seemed like the right thing to do."

"It was," she agreed, standing on tiptoe to rest her forehead against his. "And I'm sorry for upsetting you. It's just...you have this persona at the hospital, the tough plastic surgeon, but I like your Lexie said better."

"My Lexie side?" he asked in amusement.

"The sweet, caring boyfriend who offers to perform a surgery the patient essentially could have done without but he's doing it anyway," she murmured against his lips. "It's kind of a turn on."

"Is it now? Maybe I should do it more often then," he said with a smirk.

Lexie laughed and replied, "It's nice to see you care. I know you don't like getting attached and all with patients, but it's sweet when you."

Mark brushed a wet strand of hair off of Lexie's cheek, tucking it behind her ear..

"I did for you," he reiterated. "Your devotion to people is hard to grasp sometimes, but it makes sense with this girl."

"Mikayla," Lexie reminded. "She does have a name."

"Mikayla, right," Mark said with a nod. "I know there's a draw to her with Emily and all, but I can see how you would care regardless."

"Is Mark Sloan getting sentimental?" Lexie teased, causing Mark to roll his eyes.

"I was trying to say I can relate," Mark went on, his hand tracing circles on the small of Lexie's back. "She's alone right now and needs people. I get that."

"It's okay to feel compassion," Lexie said. "I like to see you care. Remember the little girl, who's father came in after jumping out of the window in the middle of the night?"

Mark nodded.

"I saw you, sitting with her in the waiting room as she slept on her shoulder," Lexie shared. "It was before we happened, but it's probably what pushed me to go that night, that memory. She trusted you; she felt safe. And it was so sweet to see you with her."

"They always tell you in med school to avoid that," Mark said. "Avoid getting attached. But it makes you a better doctor. Your patients trust you."

"I know the risks," Lexie said, her tone turning somber. "I know what happened to Izzie. I know. And I'm scared because today I can't do anything to help and normally I would just sit in the gallery and deal but...she has to pull through, Mark. She has to, I can't..."

Lexie bit her lip and tried to fight the tears. "I can't cry. I'm not suppose to cry because I'm not suppose to care this much."

"It's okay," Mark consoled, holding her close. "It's okay."

------

"How did it go?"

Lexie walked quickly down the hallway, chasing after Callie who had just scrubbed out of Mikayla Clarkson's leg repair.

"Grey, not now," Callie snapped, pulling her scrub cap off her head and turing down the hall, walking in the direction of the nearest on call. "I'm tired and I need sleep. Interrogate your boyfriend later."

"Is he done yet?"

"Do you seem out here?" Callie waved her arms over head. "Use your head, Grey."

"You're in a good mood," Lexie observed. Callie turned.

"I'm tired. Tired people are rarely in good moods," she said flatly. Lexie bit her lip and looked at her apologetically. Callie sighed; Lexie's innocent looks could break anyone. "Her vitals dipped once, but they went back up and stayed stable. Mark's about halfway done and should be out soon, okay?"

Lexie let out her breath, a grateful smile spreading across her face.

"Thanks, Callie," she said as Callie nodded.

"I'm going to sleep now," she stated and Lexie laughed to herself as Callie turned on her heel and marched down the hallway, shutting the room's door with forceful bang.

"It's going okay," Lexie told herself. She found comfort knowing Mark in there. "It's okay."

"Talking to yourself now, Lexipedia?" Alex said with an amused tone. "Sloan finally get to you?"

"Funny," Lexie deadpanned, not in the mood to deal with him. "Beat on my relationship. Original."

"Someone's a good mood," he observed.. "Not getting anymore."

"More than you're giving out," Lexie countered sweetly as Alex's face fell into a scowl. "Remember, girls talk."

"Yeah, well, at least my relationship is going somewhere," Alex snapped, "instead of half the hospital waiting for my boyfriend to sleep with someone else."

Lexie rolled her eyes. So many people had said the some version of that statement to her, warning her of Mark's ways ever since she had been with him; he had assured her again and again to would never happen, but it still stung, just a little.

"Yes, because I haven't heard that one either," Lexie said. "Really, Alex. Just leave me alone."

"Meredith's right. Something's up with you," Alex said, putting his hands on her hips as he looked her up and down.

"What? Nothing's up with me. Why-what, what did Meredith say?" Lexie asked nervously. She thought she and her sister had finally been on good terms, but if she was talking about her...

"She just thinks its weird you're still on the case after your spaz out in the differential," Alex explained. "And then we all reminded her that you're sleeping with Sloan; you, Yang, and Mer are always getting favors."

Lexie was used to the interns riding her about that, at first, but after a week of Mark's wrath, they had stopped. To hear it from Alex, though, someone she had considered to be her friend, hurt a bit more. To hear from Alex that Meredith was saying those things, though, hurt the most.

"She said that?" Lexie asked, her voice small. Alex smirked, knowing he had hit a nerve.

"She said it and clearly didn't tell you," he observed. "Guess all is not as it seems."

Lexie shook her head, biting her lip. She turned her back on Alex and went to the nearest nurse's station, requesting they tell Doctor Sloan to page her when he was out of surgery. The nurse nodded, smirking at Lexie and she heard the giggles as she walked her away; the nurses clearly felt the way Alex had said they did.

She shook her head and went in search of her sister, rather proud of herself for not even considering the option of crying; she wasn't upset what people were saying, rather amused at the sick irony of her life- her relationship with George had literally died and the one with her sister seemed to be on its way to emotionally.

-----

Mark scrubbed out out surgery, ready to fall asleep where he stood, only keeping himself awake by the reminder he had to say goodbye to Lexie before heading back to the apartment; his hope was that he was so exhausted he wouldn't even notice Lexie wasn't in bed with him.

He stepped out into the hall, noting Callie who stepped out from an on call room, yawning as she stretched her arms over her head.

"You just get up?" he asked by way of greeted. She nodded.

"Paged down to the pit," she replied. "I'm on call with your girlfriend tonight."

"Keep an eye on her, will you?" Mark asked as the pair began to walk down the hall. "She's been-"

"-acting weird lately? Yeah, I've noticed," Callie said. "What's going on with her? She practically jumped me when I came out of surgery earlier."

"She's, ah, dealing with some things," Mark said, trying to avoid going into detail, knowing it didn't matter though, as he would probably end up telling Callie anyway. "The patient, she's just worked up over the patient."

"Mikayla?" Callie pointed over her shoulder in the direction of the OR she had just vacated. ""What's going on?"

Mark ran a hand over his face, stopping in front of the OR board. "She's just...the girl's bringing up a lot of old feelings?"

"Then why is she still on the case?" Callie asked, putting her hands on her hips and raising her eyebrow in question. "You know the rule, especially after Stevens."

"Lex and I weren't even here when that happened," Mark reminded.

"Not an excuse."

"It's not the same!" Mark defended. "You know Lex, she wouldn't let it get like that."

"Then what's going on?" Callie pressed. She walked closer to him and said in a softer tone, "You never keep things from me, and I feel like I've barely known what's going on with you lately."

"You've just ever had a patient you've really felt connected to?" Mark asked, looking at Callie pointedly, for he knew she did. She crossed her arms and nodded. "That's what it's like for her. She's cares; she's not going to hurt anyone."

Callie pointed a finger at him and said, "I'm trusting you on this. First sign of-"

"Yeah, okay, I get it, Torres," Mark said, standing up.

"Dr. Sloan?"

Mark turned to face a nurse, a young pretty blond who looked up at him with a flirtatious gaze.

"What?" he barked flatly, having no tolerance for any of the nursing staff anymore, not since Lexie.

"I was told to give you a message," the nurse said, tilting her head to the side and giving him a smile. "From Dr. Grey?"

"What?"

"Well, she seemed upset. I mean, I saw her talking with Dr. Karev before and-"

"Give me the damn message and then leave me alone," Mark cut her off with a snap.

The nurse's face fell as she told him flatly, "She said to page her when you were done. Would you like me to?"

"It's fine; I'll find her," Mark said, walking away with Callie at his heels. "I hate the nurses."

"I had no idea," Callie deadpanned. "But how are you suppose to find her? She's on call; she could be anywhere."

Mark turned.

"I have a pretty good idea."

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